Resources
Practical tools you can use today, scripts, checklists, and toolkits built from real counseling practice. Take what helps, leave the rest.
Calm-down conversation script
When your child is flooded, connection comes before correction. Try these, slowly:
“You don’t have to talk yet — we can just breathe together.”
“Let’s take three slow breaths. I’ll do them with you.”
“When you’re ready, you can tell me what happened, or just show me.”
“Nothing you’re feeling is too much for me.”
ADHD school accommodations checklist
Common, reasonable supports to ask about at your next school meeting:
- Preferential seating, near the teacher and away from high-traffic areas
- Extended time on tests and larger assignments
- Big tasks broken into smaller steps with check-ins
- Built-in movement breaks and flexible seating
- Instructions given both verbally and in writing
- A reduced-distraction space for testing
- Fidget tools or noise-reducing headphones when needed
- Visual schedules and checklists
- A spare set of materials kept at home
- Frequent, specific positive feedback
Emotional regulation toolkit
Co-regulate first; a calm adult is the most powerful tool in the room. Then reach for:
- Name it to tame it — put words to the feeling out loud
- Box breathing — in for 4, hold 4, out 4, hold 4
- 5-4-3-2-1 grounding — 5 things you see, 4 you hear, 3 you touch, 2 you smell, 1 you taste
- Heavy work — wall pushes, carrying something weighted, a big squeeze
- Cold reset — cold water on the wrists or face
- A calm corner — a set spot with comfort items to retreat to
School meeting prep, questions to bring
Walk into the IEP, 504, or parent-teacher meeting with these:
- What specific strengths are you seeing in my child?
- What does the struggle actually look like in class?
- What supports are in place now, and how well are they working?
- What can we try next, and how will we measure whether it helps?
- How will we stay in touch between meetings?
Recommended books
How to Keep House While Drowning — KC Davis
Gentle, shame-free strategies for care tasks when your capacity is low.
A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD — Solden & Frank
A compassionate workbook written for the way women’s brains actually work.
The Explosive Child — Ross Greene
A connection-first approach for kids with big reactions and low frustration tolerance.
Uniquely Human — Barry Prizant
A strengths-based way of understanding autism that changes how you see behavior.
Recommended websites
Education and support for children and adults with ADHD.
The International Association for Premenstrual Disorders, resources for PMDD and PME.
Practical guidance for learning and thinking differences across the lifespan.
Free printable versions of these tools are on the way. Check back soon.
RootednChaos offers tools and writing, not medical or mental health treatment. If you’re struggling, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed mental health professional. If you’re outside the U.S., your local health service can help you find support near you.
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